I posted it on my Facebook status. I emailed my friends and family. And now I'm posting it on my blog.
Baby Burns #2 due May 15, 2009.
Phone call, you say? What is this, 2003?
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Better Than Flowers
BPD doesn't bring flowers.
Okay, that's not exactly true. He's brought flowers on a few selected occasions that had very little to do with a momentous event, i.e. our anniversary, my birthday or Valentine's Day.
BPD gets a lot of flack for this. Especially when I see the flowers sitting at the reception desk for another co-worker who is celebrating a momentous day, and super especially on Valentine's Day when the receptionist I'm sure feels more like a florist than a receptionist. I can only ogle, and drool, and seethe.
As I get wiser (read: older), and realize that I will soon be married longer than my parents were, and that other friends and family who were married around the same time I was are now divorced, I'm starting to realize the true meaning of flowers: they are beautiful, they are thoughtful, but they are temporary and their meaning doesn't last longer than the last wilted petal.
In our 12 (yeah, you read that right, 12) years together, BPD has done so many things whose impact has lasted WAAAAY longer than the time between when you get a nice set of flowers and you throw them away because you're embarrassed that such decrepit, moldy flora is still on your desk.
So on this, a day that otherwise means nothing whatsoever, I sit to memorialize the 12 things my husband has done that beat flowers hands down (get it, like a dozen?):
1. Moving from Canada to California to take a chance on a girl you hardly knew.
2. Working at that job you hated to put me through law school.
3. That one time, when we were living in that small house in San Diego with the crappy heater, you let me put my cold feet on you. That is when I knew this was real love.
4. That other time, when we were staying in an airport-adjacent hotel the night before flying out, and you drove all the way home to get my makeup that I forgot.
5. That other, other time, when you flew down to San Diego to rescue me from taking care of a 4 month old when I was feverish, sick, and alone. (of course, I had to call the Menlo Park police to wake your ass up since you wouldn't answer your cell phone, but that's a story for another time)
6. That other, other, other time, when you took a taxi to the Ritz to rescue me. You know what I mean.
7. Being the most patient man in the face of pregnancy hormones which, now I see in retrospect, were off the charts.
8. Being a better father than I even thought you would be. And that's saying a lot, because even at 19, I knew you would make a fantastic dad.
9. Being so supportive of my career, even though it is a tough one for married couples, and an even tougher one for families.
10. For getting into a bar fight that one time over my honor. (I know that never happened, but I believe that it would, if the opportunity presented itself. Or maybe I'm just deluding myself with my little fantasy.)
11. For crying with me and holding me when we lost Maddy. And Hector.
12. For sticking it out for 12 years, for growing up with me, for making me know that what we have is better than a relationship where you send me flowers but don't share your entire life with me.
There's a lot more, of course, but most of them consist of "for going to Taco Bell to get me Crunchy Taco Supremes in the middle of the night" (and believe me, there were a lot of those).
But you get the idea.
Okay, that's not exactly true. He's brought flowers on a few selected occasions that had very little to do with a momentous event, i.e. our anniversary, my birthday or Valentine's Day.
BPD gets a lot of flack for this. Especially when I see the flowers sitting at the reception desk for another co-worker who is celebrating a momentous day, and super especially on Valentine's Day when the receptionist I'm sure feels more like a florist than a receptionist. I can only ogle, and drool, and seethe.
As I get wiser (read: older), and realize that I will soon be married longer than my parents were, and that other friends and family who were married around the same time I was are now divorced, I'm starting to realize the true meaning of flowers: they are beautiful, they are thoughtful, but they are temporary and their meaning doesn't last longer than the last wilted petal.
In our 12 (yeah, you read that right, 12) years together, BPD has done so many things whose impact has lasted WAAAAY longer than the time between when you get a nice set of flowers and you throw them away because you're embarrassed that such decrepit, moldy flora is still on your desk.
So on this, a day that otherwise means nothing whatsoever, I sit to memorialize the 12 things my husband has done that beat flowers hands down (get it, like a dozen?):
1. Moving from Canada to California to take a chance on a girl you hardly knew.
2. Working at that job you hated to put me through law school.
3. That one time, when we were living in that small house in San Diego with the crappy heater, you let me put my cold feet on you. That is when I knew this was real love.
4. That other time, when we were staying in an airport-adjacent hotel the night before flying out, and you drove all the way home to get my makeup that I forgot.
5. That other, other time, when you flew down to San Diego to rescue me from taking care of a 4 month old when I was feverish, sick, and alone. (of course, I had to call the Menlo Park police to wake your ass up since you wouldn't answer your cell phone, but that's a story for another time)
6. That other, other, other time, when you took a taxi to the Ritz to rescue me. You know what I mean.
7. Being the most patient man in the face of pregnancy hormones which, now I see in retrospect, were off the charts.
8. Being a better father than I even thought you would be. And that's saying a lot, because even at 19, I knew you would make a fantastic dad.
9. Being so supportive of my career, even though it is a tough one for married couples, and an even tougher one for families.
10. For getting into a bar fight that one time over my honor. (I know that never happened, but I believe that it would, if the opportunity presented itself. Or maybe I'm just deluding myself with my little fantasy.)
11. For crying with me and holding me when we lost Maddy. And Hector.
12. For sticking it out for 12 years, for growing up with me, for making me know that what we have is better than a relationship where you send me flowers but don't share your entire life with me.
There's a lot more, of course, but most of them consist of "for going to Taco Bell to get me Crunchy Taco Supremes in the middle of the night" (and believe me, there were a lot of those).
But you get the idea.
Monday, August 25, 2008
one of the nice things about having a few extra bucks
when you've had a bad day, pounding headache, everyone just wants wants wants from you such that you can't get your work done, computer crashes, you can't have a cocktail during dinner because your toddler spazzes before you even get in the restaurant -- you can drive yourself to the local little market, and buy the GOOD vodka because this is not the day to go cheap.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
the little things that are so stupid
when you click on my profile, and my picture appears, it asks if you want to view it "full size" (wait, why does that sound like an innuendo? but I digress). When you click on the View Full Size link, a new window comes up - with the picture the same size! Duh blogger, "in a new window" does not equal "full size."
Thursday, July 24, 2008
bring on the kool-aid, 'cuz I'll drink it
Feeling pretty impressed about the idea of Facebook Connect, after seeing the keynotes at F8 yesterday. You go out and conquer the world, Facebook...I'll be here to help (on the trademarking, anyway).
Sunday, July 13, 2008
working, argh
Getting very sick of working on the weekends. Life of a lawyer, I know, but I miss the fam.
At least I'm working on something I like -- As of 2 months ago, I (well, my firm actually, but I'll take the credit) am trademark counsel to Facebook. They are a very fun client. And I'm LEGITIMATELY on Facebook like every day.
At least I'm working on something I like -- As of 2 months ago, I (well, my firm actually, but I'll take the credit) am trademark counsel to Facebook. They are a very fun client. And I'm LEGITIMATELY on Facebook like every day.
Friday, July 4, 2008
it's only freaking DAYCARE, but we are snobs nonetheless
The time has come to choose a daycare for Erin. Shawn will be going back to school in September, bringing an end to the full-time stay at home dad era. (Of course, the full-time stay at home mom era ended LAST September when I went back to work, but that's neither here nor there, just a little jealousy on my part ... seriously, I do love my job, but sometimes I am envious of the fact that if a playdate (unlike work) is no longer fun, you can just leave... but I digress).
Even though September is a few months off, the title fight is happening now, as two daycare centers where we've had Erin on the list are offering her a spot and want our answer Monday. Here are the contenders:
In this corner, weighing in at a total of 160 kids, from ages 6 weeks to 4.5 years, is the Children's Preschool Center (CPSC). A veteran player at 24 years old (NAEYC accredited for 17), CPSC has a lot going for it: good curriculum for the pre-school set (3 and up), a large outdoor facility, and the opportunity for on-site extra curricular activities such as piano and dance (also starting at 3 and up). There's also a catered lunch option for you fans (read: parents) who just can't seem to get your act together. CPSC has had some struggles, including a less than sparkling cleanliness, and seemingly little parental involvement.
And, in the other corner, weighing in at a total of 144 kids (but seeming to have a lot less), is the Children's Center of the Stanford Community ("Stanford"). A parent-involved co-op, Stanford has been around since 1969, with the last 19 years accredited by NAEYC. A clean, bright, and cozy facility (even if somewhat small-ish), Stanford's main drawback is that it only has a 4 day a week spot (okay, only a drawback if you are seeking a 3 day a week spot). And there's the fact that the parents have to bring snacks for the whole class, only a drawback if you're one of those parents that can't seem to get your act together (as noted above).
Both contenders have been weighed (read: inspected carefully by an annoying million-question-asking trademarkmama), and after several bouts of discussion, one has emerged triumphant: Stanford.
Why? Because we're snobs.
okay, okay, not just because we're snobs. We like the co-op aspect better (parents there all the time, a huge plus). And we got a better vibe from the place (less institutional and more likely to be customized or flexible to our needs - I likened it to a microbrew versus MGD). And it is on the way from home to work or school, and the other is like a good 3 miles the wrong way.
And even though I liked the pre-school curriculum better at CPSC, and the potential for other activities, we are going to settle on Stanford despite the fact that they only have a 4 day spot.
Because it's Stanford.
For Shawn, he wants to be able to say that his daughter is only 14 months old and goes to Stanford.
For me, I have this irrational idea that since we've had her on the waiting list at Stanford for over a YEAR AND A HALF (as compared to 3 months with CPSC), it MUST be better because it's more exclusive, right??? (yeah, I know, I fall prey to the "if you put a velvet rope outside a club it must be exclusive" line of thinking).
Hey, it's not as if our snobbery is to her detriment - Stanford is a great facility, and I think she'll really love it there. (As an aside, as I see her morph into this very social, very active little busybee, I am much much more comfortable with the decision to put her in daycare in the first place - when we visited both places, she practically wormed her way into the classrooms and playgrounds and could give a smurf whether we were there at all).
But, I'm willing to call it what it is - we're snobs, and so our daughter is going to Stanford come fall.
Can I get one of those t-shirts or bumper stickers that says "My husband AND my daughter and my money go to Stanford?"
Even though September is a few months off, the title fight is happening now, as two daycare centers where we've had Erin on the list are offering her a spot and want our answer Monday. Here are the contenders:
In this corner, weighing in at a total of 160 kids, from ages 6 weeks to 4.5 years, is the Children's Preschool Center (CPSC). A veteran player at 24 years old (NAEYC accredited for 17), CPSC has a lot going for it: good curriculum for the pre-school set (3 and up), a large outdoor facility, and the opportunity for on-site extra curricular activities such as piano and dance (also starting at 3 and up). There's also a catered lunch option for you fans (read: parents) who just can't seem to get your act together. CPSC has had some struggles, including a less than sparkling cleanliness, and seemingly little parental involvement.
And, in the other corner, weighing in at a total of 144 kids (but seeming to have a lot less), is the Children's Center of the Stanford Community ("Stanford"). A parent-involved co-op, Stanford has been around since 1969, with the last 19 years accredited by NAEYC. A clean, bright, and cozy facility (even if somewhat small-ish), Stanford's main drawback is that it only has a 4 day a week spot (okay, only a drawback if you are seeking a 3 day a week spot). And there's the fact that the parents have to bring snacks for the whole class, only a drawback if you're one of those parents that can't seem to get your act together (as noted above).
Both contenders have been weighed (read: inspected carefully by an annoying million-question-asking trademarkmama), and after several bouts of discussion, one has emerged triumphant: Stanford.
Why? Because we're snobs.
okay, okay, not just because we're snobs. We like the co-op aspect better (parents there all the time, a huge plus). And we got a better vibe from the place (less institutional and more likely to be customized or flexible to our needs - I likened it to a microbrew versus MGD). And it is on the way from home to work or school, and the other is like a good 3 miles the wrong way.
And even though I liked the pre-school curriculum better at CPSC, and the potential for other activities, we are going to settle on Stanford despite the fact that they only have a 4 day spot.
Because it's Stanford.
For Shawn, he wants to be able to say that his daughter is only 14 months old and goes to Stanford.
For me, I have this irrational idea that since we've had her on the waiting list at Stanford for over a YEAR AND A HALF (as compared to 3 months with CPSC), it MUST be better because it's more exclusive, right??? (yeah, I know, I fall prey to the "if you put a velvet rope outside a club it must be exclusive" line of thinking).
Hey, it's not as if our snobbery is to her detriment - Stanford is a great facility, and I think she'll really love it there. (As an aside, as I see her morph into this very social, very active little busybee, I am much much more comfortable with the decision to put her in daycare in the first place - when we visited both places, she practically wormed her way into the classrooms and playgrounds and could give a smurf whether we were there at all).
But, I'm willing to call it what it is - we're snobs, and so our daughter is going to Stanford come fall.
Can I get one of those t-shirts or bumper stickers that says "My husband AND my daughter and my money go to Stanford?"
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